Monthly Archives: November 2007

Ten Cents A Coup, by Phil Ochs

It was a used-car dealer’s election
The choice was rather small
The boys agreed
It’s the war we need
So there’s no President at all

Here’s to the Grand Old Party
They are the stars of the stage and screen
It’s not since Laurel and Hardy
Have I laughed so hard I screamed.


Filed under Presidential Campaign

Damn-O-Crat Slogans

Hillary Clinton – Her Husband was President, and anything he can do she can do better!

Hillary Clinton – Let’s talk about entitlements!

Baruch O’Bamagh – Irish, Jewish, Black, White, Christian, African, American.

Barack Obama – Dick Cheney’s liberal cousin.

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Filed under Presidential Campaign

Sloganistas for the Republicanistas

What the Fuck?
I’m With Chuck!

Vote for Huck!
Mike Huckabee!

Because only a tough Cross-Dresser Can Put Osama in the Cross-Hairs!
And it takes a tough man to make a tender chicken!

What’s more American than a Mormon?
A Liberal Morman From Massachusetts!
Vote for Mitt Romney
After all, Nixon Loved Donny and Marie (Osmond)

He Missed Woodstock in the ’60’s
And missed the White House in 2000
So Vote for McCain
He’ll feel better.

Fred Thompson.
Because Teri is just as pretty as Elizabeth Kucinich and she’s American!
And Fred hates New York!

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Dubya on Rudy, Mitt, & Huckabee

Dateline, Camp David, Nov. 23, 2007.

Being a fellow Yale man, and a secret member of ‘Skulls and Bones,’ I checked with my boy Dubya on his picks for ’08.

This is what he said to me and my partner:

“Well now lil’ feller and listen up lil’ girl,’

“Rudy, He’s kinda stubborn, loyal. But the boys on Wall St like him, Tho he arrested a couple guys way back when. Putting the Emergency Response office in the World Trade Center was kinda dumb. But he made out ok. And that boy Keric. I don’t know. Tough like Cheney, but dumb as a rock. The Log Cabins like Rudy, like how he likes them, like how he dresses up. Rudy’s ok, He’s not one of us, but we can use him.

“And Mitt, He’s one of them Mormon Christians. Kind of wishy-washy. Must be a Massachusetts thing. Shoulda stayed in Oklahoma, or Minnesota, or Michigan. Whatever. I do like how he pretends to forget that Obama-guy’s name, calls him Osama. I would say ‘him running for Presidnet, he’s Barakin up the wrong tree. Get it – Barak – Bark. Heh, heh, heh. (At this he scratched Barney’s ears.) Anyways, Mitt calling Obama ‘Osama,’ that’s good. Not Karl Rove ‘McCain had a illigititate kid good,’ not ‘Lee-Atwater / Willie-Horton good,’ but good. I wonder if he’s behind that ‘Obama is a Moslem’ thing. That’s real good. Maybe even ‘Rove-Atwater’ good. Mitt’s not one of us. I claimed to be willing to work with the other side. Mitt really is willing to work with them liberal communinst pinkos. Then he regrets it. Sorta like havin’ too much to drink one night and wakin’ up with a headache. Like health care in Massachusetts. He’s not really one of us. Dangerous.

“Mike Huckabee, he’s misguided. He’s kind of like a Damn-o-crat. But he’s a Christian, so he can’t really be a Damn-o-crat. Do you think Jesus would be a Damn-o-crat? Buildin’ schools? Helpin’ the poor? Give people health care? Create jobs? Protect the enviro-mint? Why that boy Huckabee actually believes that the purpose of Gov-mint is to provide for the consumers, who he calls ‘citizens’ when actuality it’s jist to funnel taxpayer money from people who work fer a living to your friends and mine who own and manage large corp-rations and live on stock dividends and bonds. He’s not really ok. I don’t know how he calls his self a Christian. He even claims he’s a minister.

“The thing is, who-ever wins don’t matter. We might even give them 4 years of Hillary so they think things is ok. So they believes their precious Const-It-Too-Shun is working. Then Jeb’ll run in 2016 and Jenna in 2024. Squash that Const-It-Too-Shun theory like Evolution.

“But don’t tell anyone.

“And remember, we’re listening. You think it’s only China what is monitoring the Inter-anet?”

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Giuliani: The Perfect Liberal Republican

Giuliani supports gay people, altho he is not really in favor of gay marriage. He believes everyone should have marriages like his first two – unhappy.

He supports a woman’s right to choose, but is against abortion – believing that women should be free to choose husbands, shoes, fashions, that sort of thing, which is more than women have in Saudi Arabia.

He stands firm on his decision to locate the NYC Emergency Response Headquarters in World Trade Center Building 7, only blaming the people who advised him to put it in Brooklyn when questioned by those pesky reporters who insist on the facts.

I guess it boils down to “It depends on what the meaning of the word is, is.”

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Filed under Giuliani, Presidential Campaign

Jersey Tomatoes – In November?

Here I am with my tomato plants. I’ve 3 plants and about 20 green and very slow ripening tomatoes, and it’s November 4.

And at the same time that I’m raking my leaves, I’m watering the tomatoes and mowing the lawn.

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Filed under Global Warming.

Energy: Where do we go from here?

Energy: What do we do next? Where do we go from here? Solar? Wind? Nuclear? Coal? Oil? Negawatts?

Burning coal and oil create greenhouse gases and other pollutants. Nuclear power produces radioactive waste and a prodigious amount of heat pollution. Nuclear and fossil fuels require mines, mills or wells, and they are really bad for the environment, causing everything from pollution to global warming.

Negawatts makes sense. Hybrid cars get great gas mileage and offer a smooth, quiet, comfort. Every barrel of oil we don’t burn is better for our economy. Every barrel of oil we don’t buy from Iran, Saudi Arabia, or Venezuela is $80 or $90 or $100 that doesn’t go into the hands of people like Achmadinejad, Bandar, or Chavez. That’s good for us and bad for the terrorists.

Solar and Wind are not perfect. People complain that they don’t look pretty. But they create jobs not pollution. They help our national security infrastructure. And they look fine to me. I’d rather see solar panels on my roof and wind turbines on my horizon then global warming and my money going to thugs like Achmadinejad.

Where do we go from here? Clean Energy or Dirty Energy?

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Filed under Energy

Hillary contradicts herself, appears weak, indecisive, and secretive.

At the Democratic Party Debate, Tuesday, Oct. 30, Hillary Clinton, widely perceived by everybody but Democrats as the Democratic Party “front-runner” in the race to the race for the White House, seemed to stumble.

When asked about documenting undocumented aliens, Senator Clinton seemed to say she was for it, and then seemed to say she was against it, seemed to be contradicting herself. I use the precisely wishy-washy phrase “seemed to” because I’m not exactly sure what I heard and don’t want to give the wrong impression.

However Joe Biden, Chris Dodd, John Edwards, Dennis Kucinich, Barak Obama, and Bill Richardson caught on. They are listed in alphabetical order of last names because I don’t want to give the impression that I support any one candidate. I like them all. It’s so hard to make up my mind. Any one could have catapulted her out of the race by saying

So you are saying: “‘it depends on what the meaning of the word ‘is’ is.”

When asked about communications between herself and Bill Clinton, when he was President, Hillary spoke about the “process.” Bill Clinton has asked that the papers be kept secret until 2012.

I would think that Hillary would want to publish any papers that show her to be “Presidential.” As a voter, I would like to see them. She should state, unequivocally, that letters such as “love letters,” and anything personal should be kept private. But discussions involving national policy, such as health care, should be made public. After, isn’t she touting her years in the White House as experience? What has she done?

And when asked about signing on, along with 75 other Senators, to the Bush Cheney drumbeat against Iran, Hillary said ‘We have to use all diplomatic means. Just because we signed on to a non-binding resolution allowing George Bush to use means other than diplomatic doesn’t mean we favor war or anything. We need to try diplomacy first. And Bush is on the wrong course.
We need to work with Republicans.

Yep, real Presidential.


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Filed under Barak Obama, Bill Richardson, Campaign 2008, Hillary Clinton, Joe Biden, John Edwards

Mukasey Refuses To Commit.

Is “Waterboarding” torture? Mukasey won’t say. The Democrats say waterboarding is torture. The Germans, the British, the Israelis, the Chinese, the Russians, say waterboarding is torture. The British say it doesn’t work. The Russians say it’s fun, but it really doesn’t provide good information, because suspects tell the interrogators what they want to hear, to get it to stop.

But is Waterboarding Torture? Mukasey won’t say.

This is an important question. Yet it’s also important that Mukasey not answer. And here’s why. Forget the question of a U. S. Attorney General appearing to allow torture. Gonzales crossed that bridge. He even tortured his own people – Gonzales tortured Republicans. With every appearance before the Senate grinning like an idiot with his hand in the cookie jar saying ‘what cookies?’ Gonzo Gonzales tortured the Republicans, and every conservative citizen who believes in the rule of law.

Like most lawyers, Mukasey loves the law. And like most men, Mukasey has issues with committment. Perhaps if asked by Larry Craig, or an attractive women, a Senator who looked like Scarlet Johanssen, or Marilyn Monroe, Mukasey would want to commit – at least for a while.

Maybe Dick Cheney, the President of the Senate, should ask the question. He and Judge Mukasey could talk about it while hunting.

Eureka – that’s it – the prospect of a hunting trip with Dick “The Rifleman” Cheney explains why Mukasey won’t answer the question. He’s worried about being invited to hunt with Cheney. Or to visit Guantanamo to experience firsthand the pleasures of waterboarding.

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Filed under Perjury, President Bush