Category Archives: Health Care

The Republicans – The Party of No

It started with Nancy Reagan who said: “Just say no to drugs.”

The Republicans just say No to everything.

  • No Support for the Unemployed.
  • No Help if you’re Facing Foreclosure.
  • No Health Insurance for 45 to 50 Million Americans – about one in six.
  • No Vision for The Future.
  • No Understanding of Science.
  • If you’re a lobbyist, peddling influence and campaign contributions, “No, I’m not busy, come in.”
  • And if you’re on Wall Street, No way you’re responsible for your actions. You’re too big to fail. The Government will bail you out. It’s the American Way!

The Party of No!

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Filed under Bankruptcy, Campaign Finance, Health Care, Republican Values, Science

Truth To The Rumors (joke)

Moonbase Alpha, Luna City, Sea of Tranquility, the Moon, Nov. 44, 2033. It turns out there’s some truth to the rumors that President-for-Life Obama is setting up “death panels.” A task force headed by Abbie Hoffman, Anita Hoffman, Jerry Rubin and Michael Jackson has set up “death lists.”

The Hoffmans, Mr. Rubin and Mr. Jackson are no longer deceased. They were cloned in a secret lab on the moon. The process was started early in 2009, by Executive Order. They are now operating an underground base on the moon. In fairness it must be pointed out that because the moon is an asteroid with no atmosphere, all moon bases are undergound.

The Hoffmans and Rubin were picked because of their well-known radical politics. Jackson was picked because of his expertise in “moon-walking.” The clones of Jackson, Rubin, and both Hoffmans grew up in undisclosed locations and traveled back in time to work on the lists.

This reporter traveled forward in time to meet with them, hence the dateline on this filing is 24 years in the future. This story is dated November 44 because in the future there will be only four months. The first month is February, which is Black History Month. (white history is “White people brought slaves to America. Most of the Declaration of Independence was actually written by Sally Hemmings, Jefferson’s common-law wife. Abe Lincoln, who was 1/4 Black – that’s why he was so tall – freed the slaves. As his cousin Abe Lincoln Jefferson noted, “White people causes all the trouble, black folks cleans up all the mess.”) The other months include August, Obama’s birthday month, November, Michelle Obama’s birthday month, and the new month of Obama, which has both Christmas, New Years, and sometimes, to demonstrate his love for the Jewish People, Obama, who also calls himself “King of the Jews,” the Jewish New Year. All months have 61 days, except for the Month of Obama, which has 182 days, 183 on leap years.)

A dispute broke out over Sarah Palin. All four wanted her husband, Todd, and at least four (4) of her children euthanized. Jackson wanted her euthanized as well. Anita Hoffman wanted to keep her around because of her value “Yes she mobilizes the wacko far right,” Anita said, “But she motivates the left, and the women and just antagonizes the moderates – every time she opens her mouth.” Rubin and Abbie Hoffman wanted her alive because of her “entertainment” value. It turns out that they really dig chicks with guns, and don’t really care about whales, wolves, nature, or humanity.

“Having been dead,” Rubin said, “we don’t really care about life.” We just want, you know, some action.”

“And why should we care about the county that let us die?” Hoffman added.

The lists include Robert Novak, who cheated by dieing Aug. 19, 2009, Rush Limbaugh, Glen Beck, Lou Dobbs, Pat Buchanan, Bill O’Reilly, other right wing commentators, members of their audience and “base.” Anyone who watches Fox News, Lou Dobbs, or listens to Rush Limbaugh is on the list to be “euthanized.”

“America,” Mr. Hoffman explained, “is a “youth-oriented” culture. And it is increasingly dominated by Asians. What we are doing is combining these aspects of life in Amerika, linking them, into a “Youth-n-Asia” program.

Here’s how the program will work. People will lose their health insurance benefits when they change jobs or get sick. Eventually. 47 million Americans will not have Health Insurance. When they get really sick they will face bankruptcy. And 16,000 will die each year, one person every 30 minutes, every half-hour of every day. Wait – that’s what we have today.*

Ken Starr, a spokesman for the Cato Institute and the Heritage Foundation said “This is intolerable. We can’t have one person dieing every 30 minuutse. While most of these deaths are poor people, we have no way of restricting this to liberals. And then, even it it was one every 30 seconds, it would only amount to One Million per year. We need to kill more people faster, we need to kill 10 or 15 million a year to rid this nation of the scourge of Liberalism. That’s why we need more coal, oil, nuclear power, and resultant mercury and radioactive wastes. That’s why we need to bring back DDT. That’s why we need to support the drug war on poor shiftless Americans who live in inner cities.”

* This is a work of satire. However, there’s a grain of truth in it. It’s not that we have a base on the moon, or have cloned Jerry Rubin, Abbie Hoffman, Anita Hoffman, or Michael Jackson. And it’s not that we are capable of time travel. We don’t, we haven’t, and we’re not. It’s that 47 million people have no health insurance and one person dies every 30 minutes because he or she has no health insurance.

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Filed under Abbie Hoffman, Abe Lincoln, Anita Hoffman, Health Care, Jerry Rubin, Michael Jackson

In Bucco Lingua, In the Cheek the Tongue, a Pre-Existing Condition

New York, NY, Aug. 20. Reading thru my insurance policy, I learned that In Bucco Lingua Syndrome, “In The Cheek The Tongue,” aka “Tongue in Cheek” Syndrome is now classified as a pre-existing condition, and it can be used to deny health benefits to anyone, regardless of race, creed, gender, sexual orientation, age, etc. A person, or “patient-like entity” with In Bucca Lingua Syndrome only requires treatment for 72 seconds. 72 seconds is the time allocated for a “patient-like entity” to present identifrication and sign away 87.9 % of one’s assets and be given a prescription for aspirin. A “patient-like entity,” also termed a “patient-like asset” or “cash cow,” is a person named on an insurance policy for whom premiums are collected and to whom actual medical care can be legally withheld.

In Bucco Lingua Syndrome is endemic among people who watch Saturday Night Live, Mad TV, the Daily Show, the Colbert Report, who as children watched Get Smart, or who live in, grew up, or went to college in Philadelphia, Pennsylvania, parts of New Jersey, New York City, Boston, Massachusetts, Amherst, Mass, Madison, Wisconsin, Burlington, Vermont, and parts of California. It is also known to have effected people from Texas, Tennessee, Kentucky, and Utah, but only those who left those places for New York, New Jersey, California, Vermont, and Wisconsin.

Lenny Bruce, Woody Allen, George Carlin, Robin Williams, Chris Rock, Dave Chappell and Bill Maher are the most famous celebrities who have had it.

There is no cure. However, it leads to a heightened sense of fairness and joie de vivre. It it not statistically known to negatively impact life-span. I was not diagnosed with it, but then again, I can’t afford to see a doctor.

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Filed under Bill Maher, Chris Rock, Dave Chappell, George Carlin, Health Care, In Bucca Lingua, Lenny Bruce, Robin Williams, SNL, Woody Allen

I Pay But I Don’t Get It

Dear Friends and Colleagues,

I have a good job. I buy the health insurance my Human Resources Dept tells me to buy. (This is not, by the way, a “free market” as described by Adam Smith, David Ricardo, John Maynard Keynes, Milton Friedman, and the other neo-classical economists.) I pay enough that I could be driving a Mercedes – hell I could be driving a Hummer – and going about 2400 miles per month (at current gas prices).

But my coverage stinks. It’s rationed by insurance company beancounters. If I see their doctors – and a complete physical takes about two hours and 30 seconds – two hours waiting and 30 seconds in which the doc says “You’re breathing. That’s good. You’re blood pressure is high, if it gets higher we’ll put you on meds.”

But that’s ok. As long as I don’t get sick I’m ok. That’s why my blood pressure is high. I’m worried about getting sick. Or losing my job. In either case I’ll lose my house.

One thing I don’t worry about is that my octagenarian father has good health care. He worked hard all his life. He takes care of himself. And he’s on Medicare. It’s great. Efficient. Government run. Not sexy like the Apollo Mission to the moon, but very important. And for the health care that my kids teachers get. They go to public school. The teachers are in the unions. And the health care is good. The kids too get good health care. Even if their parents work but don’t get health care, then, thanks to Presidents Clinton and Obama, and despite the efforts and vetos of President Bush, they get health care.

But one of the things that really gets me, the thing that makes my blood boil – which is why I’ll need blood pressure meds – is that close to 50 Million Americans – one out of six – have no health insurance. And it’s people between the age of 18 and 65. People who work, or would work, if they could find jobs. This is wrong on many levels.

The other thing that is killing me – almost literally – is that people who make $Millions – insurance industry executives, and lobbyists and rich “Philosophers” Beck, Hannity, Limbaugh, and O’Reilley – wait, they’re not philosophers, they’re not Thinkers – they’re actors – and they are telling me what’s good for me. That’s un-American. They are sending people to disrupt “Town Hall meetings with Representatives from Congress.

On March 23, 1775, Patrick Henry, speaking at St. John’s church in Richmond, Virginia said “give me liberty or give me death.” Those guys have taken my liberty and are giving me death.

Dear President Obama, Senators, Reps. in the House,

We elected you and the Democratic majorities in the House and the Senate to fix the problems created and exacerbated by the neo-cons and the Republicans, and to do this by governing from the left of the center.

You have your work cut out for you.

Good luck.

I have your back.

But I can’t support you when I’m drowning.

(first published on Daily Kos)

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Filed under Health Care, Single Payer

Single Prayer Health Care

Wasilla, Alaska, July 27, 2009. The Republicans have finally released their health care plan. Sarah Palin, Michael Steele, and Rush Limbaugh, joined by Bobby Jindal and the Blue Dog Democrats, have announced their plan: “The Single Prayer Plan.”

The good news is that the health care plan is free. All you need to do is pray that you don’t get sick, and pray that you don’t need medicine. The bad news is that it is not proven to be effective.

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Filed under God, GOP, Health Care, Jesus., Single Payer

Montana: Big Sky, No Heart

Montana: “Big Sky Country.” However, considering Senator Max Bacus behavior last week, it could also be considered “No Heart Country.” Bacus’ conduct shows a contempt that Marie Antoinette and Dick Cheney would be proud of. The Senator from Montana makes me proud to be a citizen of New Jersey.

On Nov. 5, 2006 I saw Bill Clinton with Senator Robert Menendez in Newark. On Nov. 2, 2006, I saw Senator Menendez and Barack Obama speak at campaign rally in Hoboken. After hearing then-Senator Obama I called my father and said “I think I just saw the next President of the United States.” I heard Senator Menendez say “As a Representative in Congress I can’t vote to support a war unless the war is in our national interest and unless I would send my own children to fight.” This also makes me proud to reside in New Jersey. I am proud also that On Election night, 2008, I had the good luck to personally meet and congratulate Senator Lautenberg on his re-election, on the steps of the Helfrich in New Brunswick. A few minutes later, I watched President Obama’s victory address, and felt pride in my country, and pride in the small things I did to help President Obama’s campaign.

Barack Obama was not always my candidate of choice. Because of his position on medical care, I supported John Edwards. Medicare works well for my father. The equivalent works well, I understand, for every member of the House and Senate. And by the way, MY tax dollars pay for THEIR health care. As far as me, my health insurance costs almost as much as my mortgage. And just as my house is worth less than it used to be, my medical insurance covers less and less yet costs more and more.

Very few people seriously believe in “socialism” as opposed to free enterprise. The facts that before their system collapsed the Soviets copied American computer designs prove the value of the market. However, most people do understand that there are some facets of the economy that should be managed publicly. Law enforcement, for example. Private police forces and private armies are hallmarks of drug cartels and dictatorships. And medical care. The fact that 45 million Americans – which is almost one out of six – can’t get access to health care is a terrible indictment of our system.

While campaigning for President, John McCain echoed George W. Bush and said “Anyone has access to health care – people can just go to the emergency room.” While this is true, when people without health insurance go to the emergency room, the costs of their treatment are pushed onto the citizens. This implies a national health care policy. However, it’s one that is poorly thought out, inefficient, and badly financed. And emergency rooms are not equipped to manage things like high blood pressure, diabetes and cancer. They can’t help you if you have diabetes – unless you’re in a coma. If you have high blood pressure you’re out of luck, until you have a heart attack or a stroke. And cancer – forget about it. And one other thing: John McCain is not the President. McCain lost the election! Americans voted for Barack Obama – his values and his policies!

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Filed under Health Care

Bush Care / McCain Care – Health Care For Patriots

It’s not that one in six Americans don’t have health care, it’s just that they don’t have health insurance. And if 1 out of 6 don’t have health insurance that means 5 in 6 people DO have Health Insurance.

Bush and McCain have a national health care plan – The Emergency Room. The way you can see a doctor on BushCare / McCainCare when you have diabetes is when you’re in a diabetic coma. And if you have high blood pressure you can see an emergency room physician for primary care immediately – following a stroke or heart attack.

This shows America’s wealth. Why go to a physician for a $50 office visit when you can go to an Emergency Room – at 10 times the cost? Or 100 times the cost? You may see it as spending $5,000 – enough for a good used car – or $500, rather then $50, but what’s money when your life is at stake? And if the choice is health care, medication, or food, well, you’re probably overweight – that’s how you got diabetes or high blood pressure anyway (it’s really your fault).

And remember, treatment and medication are elements of GNP. So if you have diabetes wait until you’re in a diabetic coma. It’s your patriotic duty. If you have high blood pressure, wait until you have a stroke. Your treatment will cost $50,000. That adds $50,000 to the GNP. It’s what you can do to fight the war on terror. Like voting for the GOP. Pre-emptive care would only add $200 or $1,000 to the GNP. What’s more important? Our nation’s GNP or your health? It’s a no-brainer. If you’re a true patriot it’s GNP! Especially if you’re a wealthy patriot and can afford a doctor. Or can go to Canada for health care. And if a worker drops dead, the general health of the remainder of the population improves.

Remember – what doesn’t kill you, makes you stronger. And by that logic, America is stronger today than it ever would have been if Gore had been given the White House in 2000 or if Kerry had won in 2004.

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Filed under Bush, Health Care, McCain, Presidential Campaign

State of Duh Union

L. J. “Gonzo” Furman.

Washington. President Bush found his stride. He has a terrific career ahead of him on late night cable tv news, or Comedy Central. He may not have the physical presence of Will Ferrell, or the ‘kick them when they’re down’, ‘laughing at you not with you’ sensibility of Steven Colbert or David Letterman, but his timing and deadpan style rivals Jon Stewart, Tina Fey, Jay Leno and the other great news anchors of late night television. His ‘State of Duh Union‘ was brilliant. Bush, with his zany sidekicks, Dick ‘I-Shot-The-Lawyer’ Cheney and Karl ‘I-Don’t-Care-If-It’s-A-Felony, I’m-Not-Quitting’ Rove should star in ‘The Compassionate Conservative’ on cable with ‘The Daily Show and ‘The Colbert Report’.

With energy policy Bush started by playing it straight: ‘Energy policy is a matter of national security.’ Solar energy and wind power produce electricity without pollution, and at lower cost. But this is boring so Bush didn’t talk about this. He did say that we should double the amount of petroleum the government stores in reserve and drill for oil in the Arctic Refuge. Some say the petroleum reserves are a government handout to the oil industry. Because the government buys oil, and then locks it up never to use it, until an emergency. And in an emergency, we need more than we have in reserve, so the government buys more, usually at higher prices. Does this sound like a good deal for the taxpayers or a handout to the oil industry?

Now Bush wants to double the reserves, and drill for oil in the Arctic Refuge. We can combine these goals by using the Arctic Oil as the Reserves. Normally, to create the reserves we take oil out of the ground, ship it, refine it, spill some, then put it in tanks, never to use it.

So why not keep the oil up in the Artic Refuge for the reserves and just leave it in the ground, without the drilling, refining, spilling and storage steps. The government should just pay the oil companies to leave the oil in the ground. Of course the oil companies are supposed to be paying the government royalties on the oil they extract, but the accountants can sort out the details. The important thing is to have the oil in reserve and increase return on investment for the oil companies.

Then there’s health care. The President wants health insurance premiums to be tax deductible. So wealthy people who pay more for health care, because they can, can write off the cost of their insurance. This is fair to wealthy people. Poor people, who are poor because they have no money, don’t need to write off the cost of their health insurance premium. They don’t pay for health insurance. (They don’t have it, but that’s beside the point.) They don’t pay income tax. President Bush is only trying to give wealthy people the same advantages that poor people have.

The President also wants to tax health care benefits. This sounds great. If I am hospitalized, then I will pay income tax on the money the insurance company paid the doctors and the hospital. If I am making about $65,000 per year, and my wife has a baby, and the hospital charges about $35,000, then I’ll be taxed as if I made $100,000. When my kid goes to the doctor I’ll pay more taxes. Who needs a raise? I can just go to the doctor. Then when I feel like a million bucks the government will feel like I’m worth a million bucks too.

The President wants to reduce the number of uninsured by shifting federal money away from hospitals. I see how this will reduce the number of uninsured – they will die.

The President wants to let poor children transfer to private schools. Private schools charge tuition. I thought that poor children are poor because they have no money. I must be missing something.

Bush wants to give his plan for Iraq a chance. I admire that. When I want a game of chance I go to Atlantic City or Vegas. I lose, but what the hell. When Bush wants a game of chance he goes to war. That’s tough. And he calls himself a compassionate conservative.

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Filed under Arctic Reserves, Emergency Reserve, Health Care, Oil, state of the union.