This is not satire. Former FEMA Director Michael “Heck of a Job, Brownie” Brown joins Cold Creek Solutions, as a Disaster and Contingency Planning Consultant.
This is from a press release I was e-mailed:
Former FEMA Director Michael Brown Joins Cold Creek Solutions, Offers Consulting Practice for Disaster Recovery
CENTENNIAL, CO – While leading federal relief efforts for 160 presidential declared disasters in his roles at FEMA and Homeland Security, Michael Brown heard one cringe-worthy phrase repeated again and again.
“People always say, ‘I never thought it would happen to me,'” said Brown. “I would maintain that anyone who has a business, or a family, needs to recognize that disasters happen and disrupt life. Businesses especially need to plan for the worst.”
“Michael Brown intimately understands planning and how plans need to be adaptable and changeable,” said Paul Schwappach, principal of Cold Creek Solutions, a technology planning firm focusing on data management. “With Michael’s experience and his unique view into what possibly could go wrong when looking at a plan, we can truly help clients be prepared for the unexpected.”
It goes on (and on and on). It’s actually pretty funny.
Brown, the former undersecretary of Homeland Security, was one of the longest-serving directors of the Federal Emergency Management Agency. He led federal relief efforts for disasters including the 9/11 attacks on the World Trade Center and the Pentagon in 2001, the Columbia Space Shuttle Disaster and California wildfire season in 2003, and the unprecedented 2004-2005 hurricane seasons. Brown also directed the nation’s response to numerous foreign disasters and terrorist attacks.
Brown and Cold Creek will work to provide clients disaster recovery and business continuity solutions rooted in a perspective that can’t be found elsewhere.
There’s even more ….
Maybe he learned something, but Michael Brown is just about the last person I would want advising me on disaster contingency planning. At the risk of being accused of shamelessly hawking my own intellectual property – you can hear my thoughts on We Had The Will, We Found The Way, at cdbaby.com. The song asks:
How the hell did we go from Lincoln, FDR, and John Kennedy to Bush and Cheney?
How did we go from the New Deal to Iraq and Katrina?